Hello chirpers — I know I’ve been out of pocket for a bit but the reality of how short life is has been slapping us in the face of late.  I think God has been sending us some messages about the fragility of life…and believe you me…WE HAVE GOT IT!!!

On Tuesday, we lost my brother-in-law Jeffery tragically in a car accident. He was killed instantly and spared any suffering, for that we can be thankful.


As for the rest of us, the suffering continues.  We spent last week taking care of details and celebrating Jeff’s life.  Jeff was truly one of the most compassionate, thoughtful, giving people I have ever met.  Jeffrey didn’t want for things – he just wasn’t interested in them.  Of course, he collected things and had things he liked to do, but for the most part, Jeffery was the LEAST materialistic person I have ever met.  He was all about heart and family.

We (especially me) gave Jeff a hard time about getting a job and getting out of his parents house. He just didn’t seem to have the drive or the motivation. He helped his parents out, ran errands for his mom, mowed the lawn and helped watch his beautiful nieces when needed but we all worried about how we were going to take care of Jeff if something happened to his parents.  And now, it looks like God had a much bigger plan that we were not privy too.

Jeff’s life was cut short and we have to heal and move on, but never forget all that he  gave us in life.  I think we should all strive to be more like Jeff and revel in the feelings and the emotions, the friends and the family — instead of things and going places.  Focus on people and their feelings and praying for them and feeling for them and supporting them when most needed.  We would all do better to get back to the simple things in life, the things that truly have meaning – Friends, Family and God!  I know Jeff’s death brought these things back to the front and center for me and I hope it has for others.

Today is harder than last week — Jeffery is not at the forefront of  our days.  We are not crying, or planning, or receiving guests, or celebrating.  We are now left alone to heal without Jeffery.  There is a void left in our hearts that we’ll never forget or get over, but Jeff will no longer be our immediate focus.  That makes me sad.  I thank God for the time he gave me with Jeff and I am grateful for all the things he taught me (even though I was oblivious at the time).  I am sorry my children will not get to know his kind, compassionate heart and can only pray that they remember his beautiful eyes and smile.

Here is the poem that was on the back of the program that celebrated Jeff’s life.  I’m sorry I don’t know the origin.  I want to share because it says so perfectly all the things the I cannot.

I’m Free

Don’t grieve for me, for now I’m free

I’m following the path God has laid you see.

I took His hand when I heard him call

I turned by back and left it all.

I could not stay another day

To laugh, to love, to work to play.

Tasks left undone must stay that way

I found that peace at the close of day.

If my parting has left a void

Then fill it with remembered joy.

A friends shared, a laugh, a kiss

Oh yes, these things I too will miss.

Be not burdened with times of sorrow

I wish you the sunshine of tomorrow.

My life’s been full, I savored much

Good friends, good times, a loved one’s touch.

Perhaps my time seemed all too brief

Don’t lengthen it now with undue grief.

Lift up your hearts and peace to thee

God wanted me now; He set me free.

In loving memory of Jeffery 1983 – 2013